broke and bummed

I really don't know what to write today I am a little overwhelmed with everything that is going on right now. I am leaving for Jordan in about 6 days. My professor is actually already over there. So for the very first time in my life I am going out of the country and I am going all by my lonesome. At least for part of the journey. I feel so inadequate compared to the people I am going with that have traveled all over the world, speaking different languages and having hundreds of experiences that I am having for the first time. I'm a little overwhelmed by the entire thing.
Speaking of traveling to exotic places and doing amazing things my little brother Jon finally got his mission call to LIMA, PERU! He is going to be leaving on August 27th. I am so incredibly excited. I was terrified that he would leave while I was at Jordan but luckily that is not the case.
So I am pretty excited about this summer and I am not quite sure why. It is the first summer that I am not moving home so I will be chilling in Provo, working and hanging out with whoever else is staying. Also my family is finally making an offer on this amazing house but I refuse to go inside unless something is for sure. I just can't handle the constant rollercoaster that follows any decision my parents make. So once it is for sure I'll visit.
It's really funny what life throws at you. When I was getting ready to graduate from high school I wanted so much to be away from my family where I could do my own thing and not have the pressures of visiting and being involved in the drama. Then I went to BYU and my aunt was here. That was ok because I loved hanging out with her. Then my grandparents who have ignored me most of my life felt threatened by my relationship with my aunt and suddenly were inviting me over every sunday for dinner. Then my other grandparents moved into the area and now my family is moving up the street from where I live. I'm not saying that any of this is a bad thing it's just funny how what you thought you wanted or wanted to escape from changes throughout time.